Imagination is not satire: just once, Flamin’ Raven’s brain runs wild for the good of human kind

Flamin’ Raven | Special to and free for all

In a surprising anomalous display of statistical improbability, the entire planet experienced a 24-hour period of peace, tranquility and a complete lack of fear in what scientists are calling “the perfect day.”

Humans around the world awoke to perfect weather conditions for their respective locations, imbued with feelings of inner peace, void of any anxiety, anguish and fear that normally inhabit the minds of billions people daily.

During the course of the day, 372,466 perfectly healthy babies were born, and the families and people they were born unto faced no difficulties or financial hardships in providing the love, nourishment and shelter required to care for them. Each baby was given a gender neutral temporary name in hopes that their own personal journeys of self discovery would lead to their own true name at the appropriate time in their lives.

Young children around the world went to schools feeling confident, aesthetically sound and intelligent, facing no discriminatory actions or behavior that would cause them to question their worth or affect their ability to learn alongside their peers. This universal feeling of perfection meant no one bullied anyone else to overcome their own lack of confidence, nor did anyone feel the need to deny another community acceptance as the definition of community now contained every human being.

The religions of the world quickly called a global conference with the goal of merging various faiths under the new non-denominational moniker of “FAITH.” The amalgamation occurred through the process aggregating the common themes and doctrines of every faith, which were surprisingly plentiful, and eliminating those that conflicted, which were few. All places of worship were also authorized to be used as shelter for anyone who needed it. Faith in humanity and faith in God were reassessed to be of equal significance, and atheists around the world pledged to assist FAITH in their aid of the world’s poor and hungry.

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All wars ceased to be seen as necessary, as many of the feuding political entities no longer viewed themselves as separate, finally realizing the futility of an organism fighting itself.

Disease and illness, mental and physical, which had plagued the world for eons, were suddenly attacked with new scientific strength, thanks to unlimited resources as a result of the lack of military spending, along with the combined efforts of all countries, sharing their work and information. Cancer was expected to be fully cured through the research completed in one day.

Here in Canada, a parade was held to welcome home thousands of missing aboriginal women and children, alongside scores of people from multiple races, backgrounds and genders who inexplicably came home after leaving or being taken away. The concept of land ownership ceased to exist, as well, as the notion that people should suffer from the lack of it was deemed insensible considering there’s plenty of livable land for all.

By nightfall, music and laughter rang out through the streets of Yellowknife, and all around the world as people hugged each other and collectively refused to question whether their current existences were real, or the product of a another being’s dream. For in that perfect day, the answer did not matter.


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