Old Town Versifier: The road trip “Down South”

I was checking out the bulletin board

for what they had on hand;

there was house-sitters and sock-knitters,

besides the handy man.

There was someone with a skidoo

that’s offered up for sale,

with little paper tabs like bangs

listing his e-mail.

Old Buddy offers fire-woods,

“woods” what he wrote down…

and he offers free delivery

as long as it’s in town.

There’s a craft sale at the Legion,

and a kid’s show at the NACC,

Some lady offers money

just to get her doggie back.

But something on that bulletin board

down low and on the side…

A person looking to help pay costs

if he could get a ride.

He wanted to head Down South

it didn’t matter when;

I got a sudden big idea

and formed a plan right then.

I phoned this guy and told him

that he could ride with me,

if he would share the driving

and pay for our coffee.

“Oh I don’t really like coffee,” he said

“And I can’t drive a standard car”

“Well, never mind we’ll just drink tea”

I said “and we’re not going very far”

“So, how are you with a map?” I asked;

“I’ve got no G.P.S.”

“North is on the top of the page,

so pretty good I guess.”

Well then I told him “meet me,

at the Gold Range coffee bistro,

we’ll eat a big old breakfast

and then we’ll up and go”

Now everything was working

according to the plan,

but imagine how surprised I was,

when I found out it was… Dan!

You know Dan, the councillor-man

youngest on the team;

the City’s future shining star

who likes the colour green.

He sure seemed quite excited,

his enthusiasm wasn’t fake;

when I said I wanted to drive Down South

and check out a couple lakes.

So he jumped up from the table

and he ran to Mary’s till.

Not only did he tip her big

he even paid my bill!

We stepped out in the sunshine

and walked over to my car.

I fired all four cylinders

but I didn’t drive it far.

“Why are we stopping at the Visitors’ centre?”

said the curious little chap;

“I’m not sure how to get there”

I said, “so I want to get a map.”

Well we got our map and headed south

down Franklin Avenue,

Mother nature’s sun shone bright

the sky was pretty blue.

We passed the school, the fire-hall

drove by the Multi-plex,

Councillor Dan had a puzzled look

and wondered what was next.

“I gotta stop and get some fuel,

I hope that you don’t mind.

Then we can follow our noses,

and see what we might find.

We pull out of the Bassett’s

where they have the fuel card lock,

We stopped and looked at an old house boat

that was sitting in ‘dry dock.’

Then we pushed our way onwards

South through the industrial park

past rusted broken-down old trucks,

we heard some doggies bark.

“Let’s stop a while and check this out

we’ll give our legs a shake.”

Then councillor Dan and me went down

to get bull-rushes from Kam Lake.

“Well what are we doing here? he asked.

“I thought we we going south?”

“We did, we are,” I told him

with a smile on my mouth.

Then I said that every road-trip

needs a coffee break mid way,

so we ought to stop at Horton’s

for a steeped cup of Earl Grey

We faced the grid-lock of the drive-through

then I spoke into a sign…

“Did I want a double double?

No, two teas would do just fine.”

Then we meandered

through the Walmart parking lot,

we couldn’t sip our steeped teas

because they were too hot.

“Better get that map out Dan,

we’re headed where I’ve never went

I asked a local “Where was I?”

He told me Ward Crescent.

Then Councillor Dan said “turn left here.”

Down Borden Drive we went.

“Have you got our position on that map?”

“Yes,” he said “one hundred ten percent!”

Next, we happened on a crosswalk.

I paused to sip my tea,

Range Lake North the sign said

and a thought occurred to me.

“I wonder why they call it North

on a lake Down South this far…

I sure would like to get there,

can we make it in this car?”

Then Councillor Dan with his map in hand

said “go North on Stevens Crescent.”

He pointed out with civic pride,

the green bins omnipresent.

We went right on Rivett Crescent

and left on Kasteel Drive.

I saw a sign that read Wong Court,

I told him “Let’s take five.”

“Say now, Councillor Dan” I said,

“is this named after you?”

“No, no,” he said. “A different Wong,

from another time or two.”

We checked out all five houses

that stood in a rounded line.

And when Dan wasn’t looking,

I climbed up and stole the sign.

“C’mon,“ I said, “We gotta go.”

We made our get-a-way,

“you say that you don’t want that sign,

but you’ll thank me another day.”

We moseyed round to Magrum

after cruising Kasteel Drive.

I read a wanted poster

for some cat: ‘dead or alive.’

We made our way down Borden,

east on Butler, we had come.

We stopped beside the pump-house five,

I heard a white-noise hum.

“Follow me!” said Councillor Dan,

on the foot-path by the fence,

all bordered in with willows,

growing ‘round there mighty dense.

We stopped and took a selfie

down on that Range Lake shore.

We picked some willow roses,

then back up the path once more.

Then Councillor Dan said “that was fun,”

when we got back to my car.

“It’s nice to take a trip Down South,

without going very far!”

So the next week when I’m shopping

at the Weaver’s & Devore,

I noticed a little poster

on the bulletin board by the door.

SCENIC SOUTHERN LAKE TOURS

IN A LUXURIOUS CARAVAN

daily tours, affordable rates,

contact Councillor Dan.

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