Lament for a potato
verse by Anthony Foliot
You’ll wonder what I’m talking about
But here’s how it used to be,
For all these years I’ve used rabbit ears
For the reception of my TV
You had to arrange the ears just so
For a clearer picture to see
And then sometimes when the screen is bad
And everything is fuzzy
You have to give the ear a shake or raise it by a degree
And just as soon as you touch it
The picture is nice as can be
Then settle back on the sofa
Again, it’s all gone fuzzy
So I know this guy who’s really smart
He’s kind of a PhD
He told me the reason the screen goes clear
Was from all the moisture in me
My hand on the ears sure does the trick
Reception is clearer with me
I don’t wanna hold hands with the rabbit ears
When relaxing, watching TV
“Then grab a spud and a copper wire”
Yes this is what he told me
“You insert the wire into the spud
And hook to the back of your TV”
So the moisture from your potato-pal
Is reception guaranteed
And this is how I’ve got it at home
To watch the fuzz-free hockey
But pretty soon it’ll be for naught
Potato, take it from me
‘Cause they’ll burn off the old ana-log
To broadcast digitally
We’ll be force-fed from the cable box
With a monthly TV fee
To watch reruns from budget cuts
Of the tired CBC
