Rabbit Ears

Lament for a potato

verse by Anthony Foliot

You’ll wonder what I’m talking about

But here’s how it used to be,

For all these years I’ve used rabbit ears

For the reception of my TV

You had to arrange the ears just so

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For a clearer picture to see

And then sometimes when the screen is bad

And everything is fuzzy

You have to give the ear a shake or raise it by a degree

And just as soon as you touch it

The picture is nice as can be

Then settle back on the sofa

Again, it’s all gone fuzzy

So I know this guy who’s really smart

He’s kind of a PhD

He told me the reason the screen goes clear

Was from all the moisture in me

My hand on the ears sure does the trick

Reception is clearer with me

I don’t wanna hold hands with the rabbit ears

When relaxing, watching TV

“Then grab a spud and a copper wire”

Yes this is what he told me

“You insert the wire into the spud

And hook to the back of your TV”

So the moisture from your potato-pal

Is reception guaranteed

And this is how I’ve got it at home

To watch the fuzz-free hockey

But pretty soon it’ll be for naught

Potato, take it from me

‘Cause they’ll burn off the old ana-log

To broadcast digitally

We’ll be force-fed from the cable box

With a monthly TV fee

To watch reruns from budget cuts

Of the tired CBC


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